Worst of all, though, the shame attached to the memories of those first times marred how I would approach sex for years. I realize I fell into that old gay adage of placing my feelings on a person who, for whatever reason, was never going to invest them back in me. I believe it was just sex, or at least that’s what I have tell myself now to avoid slipping into a memory induced k-hole. I think, when I look back now and occasionally find myself tumbling through his Facebook page, that he wasn’t. I never learned whether the boy I lost my virginity to was struggling with his sexuality. I’m not sure whether I really fell for the guy or not, but I do know that at the end of it he was just using me to get off. And while at the beginning I felt like I had the upper hand in the situation-I was the one who was out and comfortable in my sexuality, right?-after each time we met became more secretive and more dirty, I began to feel secretive, dirty, and most of all shameful. We’d meet surreptitiously in dark and make out in the cold British weather on a park bench before venturing back to his place to have sex. I didn’t tell him that I’d never had sex with someone before instead, saturated with vodka and inflated by nerves, I was swept up in the motions.įor the next year, we’d hook-up on and off, usually at 3 a.m. All I know is that one moment we were talking and the next minute, well. The minutiae of exactly how things developed from us being together in that room to us having slightly unsuccessful sex in a bathroom in a different corridor have since escaped me. He was clearly intoxicated, but it was a party after all and who was I, quite drunk myself, to judge.
It was late (or early, depending on your outlook on the world) when I was joined by the boy who was living in the room next to mine, way back on the other side of the building. I can remember, although I'd had some drinks, sitting alone in my friend’s room on a single bed, the mattress overly springy and with a coarse plastic coating, attempting to stream a song over our dorm’s spotty Internet connection. The whole thing went down near the end of my freshman year at a party, at which people from the whole dorm floor were drunk and celebrating, carelessly streaming in and out of each other’s rooms, following the various different pop songs until one room took their fancy. I was at college, living in dorms, and the experience-aside from the usual horrifying awkwardness and somewhat spontaneity of the occasion-was completely and utterly unremarkable aside from one thing: the guy I slept with identified as straight. If you do Gay porn you are Gay… end of story.I was 19 when I first had full-on sex with another man. He will find a way to cheat you, he will find a way to use you and he will find a way to make you fit into his selfish goals. Don’t let his sob story make you trust him. He was pretty much forgiven by the gay community and was given more video deals! He’s a psycho and at 5’5 he has quite the Napoleon complex. He’s very active on twitter on once went on a rant that he hated gay people.
#GAY DAMIEN BROKE STRAIGHT GAY VIDEOS FREE#
He lied to the studio he worked for in order to get free rent and a free ticket out of town. He made his decision and left town on his own, why? Because he wanted to do gay porn! All the interviews where he says he was woken up and kicked out of house at 6 am was a lie. Thats total BS, people looked the other way and his parents said they’d put it behind them if he stopped. He likes to tell his sob story that he lost everything from the porn and was put out by his family and friends.
Ask around town, and you’ll get some crazy stories about the guy. He was adopted at 10 by a good family and gave them nothing but trouble. Like we believe that she didn’t ask any questions when True Life came knocking at her house? Any one from Fairborn, Dayton and Xenia Ohio know what a liar, user and has a long mean(or better, psycho streak).
#GAY DAMIEN BROKE STRAIGHT GAY VIDEOS PROFESSIONAL#
He was showcased as someone who has been able to keep his extensive porn record, 2 years and 50+ videos from his girlfriend (who has plenty of gay friends, have you.) by telling her he’s a professional model at 5’5 and has to travel constantly. THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, here’s the Dirt! Ever watch MTV’S truelife? In December the show “Im a gay for pay actor” aired and featured Luke Hiles, aka Gay Porn Star Vadim Black.